The Introverted Influencer

Drop the Hustle & Harness the Power of Feminine Flow

July 01, 2022 Erica Van Slyke Season 1 Episode 21
The Introverted Influencer
Drop the Hustle & Harness the Power of Feminine Flow
Show Notes Transcript

Have you ever felt "broken" over your inability to show up - day in day out- with consistent hustle? Well there's a biological reason, sis!

You aren't lazy, you are just playing in a paradigm you were never designed for, and in today's episode, I am sharing the science behind these energetic fluctuations.

Most importantly, I am sharing a few ways you can begin to transmute these so-called limitations into Goddess-centered power.

**All my fellow mamas out there: I am a potty-mouth,  so you may want to listen with headphones on!**

If you found this episode helpful it would mean the world to me if you could share it with a friend or screenshot this episode on your phone, upload it to Instagram stories and tag me (@designingvibes).  This podcast is not monetized, so spreading the word is the best way to "pay me back" for my time and wisdom- so to speak.

**Neuropsychophysiologist Kayla Osterhoff (data referenced in show) - Website**

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Speaker 1:

Welcome to the introverted influencer podcast. I'm your host, Erica. Vanke my soul's mission on this planet is to help fellow introverts grow their online influence and estate, a feminine flow and ease while battling the woes of depression, anxiety, and even mom guilt. I've somehow managed to build a six-figure blog without the use of social media and without sacrificing my mental health, if I can do it, you can too Welcome back to episode 21 of the introverted influencer podcast. I am so grateful you are here, and if this is your first time joining welcome, welcome. I hope my message resonates with you. So the topic for today, I feel like I'm kind of going out on a limb and trying something different. It came to me in a really random way because I hadn't initially intended to talk about it this week. ID had something different penciled in on my agenda, but the other night I was having a glass of fun and watching an interview on Gaia TV. It's like a health and spiritual app, kind of like a Netflix for woo woo hippies like myself<laugh> and I just found it very fascinating. And the interview just resonated with me to my core. And I was just inspired to share some of the findings of that interview with you guys. I just wanted to kind of go on the whim of inspiration with this content today. So essentially there was a neuroscientist on this show and she was discussing the difference in the neuro and biochemistry of males versus females, and ultimately how our industrialized society has been set up to compliment the bio rhythms of males versus that of females. And what I found, just so validating for me from watching this program and seeing those neuroscientists break it all down is that basically I am as a female, not broken or lazy for not being able to show up day in and day out in this super consistent, productive, hustling kind of way. And actually when I did try to go against my feminine nature in the past and deny myself of my fluctuations, it always ended up in burnout and ultimately a sense of inadequacy and depression. And it even at one point led me to a mental hospital and from a medical, physical and spiritual stance, you know, I've been doing this work for a few years now and even studying like Eastern traditions and Eastern like ancient teachings. I've recognized this truth for quite some time, you know, studying like cultures that actually validate the feminine, the divine feminine. And for me, like showing up as a podcast host in this entrepreneurial more dominated space, it's actually one of the issues I feel most passionately about is the power of feminine flow versus the status quo of masculine hustle and grind approach to success. So I feel like that's one of my whys in starting this podcast is to let you know, basically that as a female you're not broken and you don't have to play in a man's world by their roles, you can play to your own strengths, but I digress just having this actual biology lesson from watching this interview. It just really confirmed to me the validity and the importance of this sort of message. And before I go into detail on some of the most interesting takeaways that I got from that interview, I just wanna preface this all by saying, we need both the masculine and the feminine, the yin and the yang hill. I'm a mother of two boys, so I'm definitely not here to bash on men, but in terms of our current infrastructures, I just think it's pretty tragic that we have completely discounted the value and the power of the divine feminine. The yin our modernized world is just, it's entirely out of balance with the duality of the masculine, uh, masculine and the feminine. So for those of you new to this concept, I'm thanking, um, the simple analogy might help you. So think of the sun in the moon, we need both the sun fuels life on our planet, but the moon stabilizes the planet on its axis, which ultimately stabilizes our climate. And it also regulates our tides. The sun is constant masculine while the moon waxing and waning is ever changing just like the monthly cycle of a female. And although the moon doesn't show up the same way, day in, day out like the sun, this doesn't make the moon any less powerful or relevant to life on earth. So understanding this, I wanted to go ahead and just share some of the most interesting points that I've found in terms of the neuro biological differences in a male versus a female. And just to let you know, too to the scientists name is Kayla ooff and I will link her info in the show notes. If you want to do your own digging in your own research. So men run off of a 24 hour bio rhythm, which is dictated by adrenal hormones like cortisol, melatonin. I know there's one more, but my brain is mushed, sorry, but so given that they just run on a 24 hour bio rhythm of adrenal hormones, there's really not much fluctuation from day to day. So they are able to perform at a very consistent rate day in day out on the contrary, a female is essentially four different people in one month due to a monthly bio rhythm of four distinct phases. And these ebbs and flows are all due to fluctuations of ovarian hormones, um, estrogen in progesterone. So in phase one menstruation that's often the only phase we're really taught about. And as females, we all know it sucks. We feel gross and tired and bloated and just, well, well this is because estrogen and progesterone are at their absolute lowest. So this causes ATP production and energy levels to just bottom out. And while we often see this as a weakness in our results driven society, and we're conditioned to just fight through it, drink another cup of coffee, keep up. There's actually great value in this phase. And that is actually a heightened sense of intuition due to the changes in our neurochemistry as the progesterone, progesterone and estrogen bottom out. So knowing this, taking this into account, if you are a female business owner who actually wants to harness the power of your feminine cycles and flow while this phase is definitely not gonna be ideal for performing tasks that require a lot of stamina or focus or energy, or even like socialization and networking, this phase could be a great time to go within and reflect on goals or brainstorm for ideas or plan and even interact with like analysis related tasks. And then as estrogen begins to rise back up in phase two and phase three, you can get back into more of the demanding operations that require stamina and focus. What I found really interesting is that in phase three, the ovulatory phase, this is when you are apparently the most confident and charismatic. So in phase three, this would be an ideal time to perhaps like network and schedule presentations and public speaking events. And then in phase four, this is really cool. So phase four, your progesterone is at an all time high in this phase and it's called the Lal phase. And this is when your brain is at its greatest capacity to learn and absorb information. So this would be a great time to maybe you maybe learn about something else that could add value to your business, uh, you know, engage in continuing education. But basically this is when your brain is like a sponge in, can absorb a lot of yummy information. Now, switching from more of the hormonal changes, I thought this was very interesting taking into account the actual neurochemistry of the brain. So in terms of actual neurotransmitters, I didn't realize this, but the master neurotransmitter for a male is actually dopamine and dopamine typically fires off as a reward response when you complete tasks or achieve certain accolades, or even like when you get followers and likes on your social media. And it could easily be stated that our society is kind of dopamine obsessed and addicted, especially because of the social media, the social media thing. Now<laugh> with females, the master neurotransmitter for the female brain is actually oxytocin, which they it's called the cuddle hormone, but oxytocin really can only be produced through like skin to skin connection and contact. And what is even more terrifying that I'll learn from this interview is that dopamine can actually decrease oxytocin. So when you look at their brain, when you look at the way they're wired and compare it with the way our society functions and what our culture deems valuable, is it really any wonder that's so many of us women feel this deep sense of brokenness or even that something is missing. And all of this being said today, the reason for this episode was not to be all doom and gloom, or even get in victim mentality and talk about how unfair life is in society and just bash on men. No, the goal today Is basically, I just want to validate the feminine experience of not being on all the freaking time. Nosis, you are not lazy or inadequate. You have just been conditioned by dopamine driven society, which has marginalized women like to the point that women are often excluded from pharmacological studies, given the whole potential for pregnancy, because we're just too risky of a test participant. So marginalized in many ways, but taking this knowledge a step further and getting out of the victim mode and what was me by being aware of the cyclical nature of the female bio rhythm, you can actually empower yourself since each phase has its own distinct limitations and superpowers. If you will, you can empower yourself by building a routine and a way of life that plays to your strengths in each phase of your cycle. And what has been so beautiful about working in the online space and becoming a blogger and an online entrepreneur is that I have the privilege to allow myself grace with each phase I'm not available for burnout or working myself to the point of a freaking mental breakdown, cuz I've been there and done that just so I can pat myself on the back for being a hustler because I know that's, what's praised that's the status quo. And what I've realized is that when I do actually give myself permission to rest and go inward, I can come back to my work in such a more potent way. It's like riding a wave. It's like learning to be a surfer here when you're working with your female bio rhythms. And not only have I realized that downtime ha equips me with intuitive downloads and ideas, but my heightened energy, you know, when I'm in phase two phase three, I can harness that energy and just actually get so much more accomplished than if I were to just force myself to show up for these arbitrary hours day after day after day after day. So I kind of feel like I'm rambling a little, but if you take away anything from this episode, I just want you to know that you are magical just the way you are with all your ebbs and flows. And if you ever start to doubt it, just think about the moon with all of its various ways of showing up and despite its inconsistent way of being and showing up, ultimately it is powerful. It controls the ocean ties and it keeps our planet stable on its axis. So I know many of you don't yet have the privilege to completely harness this unconventional way of going about your phases and your energy levels and your bio rhythms. But I think just by being aware of these fluctuations, maybe you can start to formulate a plan for the future. And ultimately we can change the way we go about society and our, the way our economy functions. So you are not broken. You are the moon baby. I really thank you so much for sitting here and tolerating my rambling today. I hope this message gave you some kind of hope or helped you feel normal<laugh> and I make no money from this episode. So the best way to just pay it forward is by leaving this show a five star review on whatever podcast platform you use or by sharing it with a friend or even better screenshotting this episode on your phone, uploading it to your Instagram story and tagging me in it. Designing, sending you my love.